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This American Ex-Wife: How I Ended My Marriage and Started My Life

This American Ex-Wife: How I Ended My Marriage and Started My Life

by Lyz Lenz

Crown ·2024 ·288 pages
Maybe Someday
Maybe Someday
I Index
28/99
Bottom of the Pile

4/99

Critics' Rating Index

Near the Top

52/99

Readers' Rating Index

n/a

Scholars' Citation Index

51/99

Volume of Reviews

86/99

Volume of Reader Ratings

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About This Book

A manifesto on the gender politics of marriage (bad) and divorce (actually pretty good!) in America today, and an argument that the former needs a reboot Studies show that nearly 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women—women who are tired, fed up, exhausted, and unhappy. Journalist Lyz Lenz is one such woman whose life fell apart after she reached a breaking point in her twelve-year marriage. In this exuberant and unapologetic book, Lenz flips the script on that narrative and preaches the good gospel of the power of divorce. The end of a marriage is often seen as the failure of the individual—most often the woman. We've all seen how media portray divorced women: sad, lonely, drowning their sorrows in a bottle of wine, desperate for a new man. It's as though they did something wrong, so they've been cast out from society. Lenz sees divorce as a practical and powerful solution for women to take back the power they are owed, while examining why we call divorce a failure when it's heterosexual marriage that has been flawed all along. How can women succeed in marriage when most relationships are based on inequality? This book weaves reportage with sociological research, literature with popular culture, and personal stories of coming together and breaking up to create a kaleidoscopic and poignant portrait of American marriage today. Lenz argues that the mechanisms of American power, justice, love, and gender equality remain deeply flawed, and that marriage, like any other cultural institution, is due for a reckoning. Unlike any other book about divorce, this raucous manifesto for acceptance, solidarity, and collective female refusal takes readers on a riveting ride—all while pointing us toward something a little freer.


Reviews

"This is galvanizing stuff."

Publishers Weekly Read review ↗ Near the Top

"But is this really an argument against marriage in general?"

Judith Newman· The New York Times Read review ↗ Maybe Someday

"What ultimately makes it compelling, whatever one's feelings about straight marriage, is the sheer joy that Lenz so obviously experiences as a single woman."

Jessica Ferri· The Washington Post Read review ↗ Near the Top

"she's textured and insightful."

Laura Kipnis· The New Republic Read review ↗ Maybe Someday

"It can tempt writers to map their own experiences too neatly onto collective ones while also undermining the specificity and perspective that a good memoir needs."

Lily Meyer· The Atlantic Read review ↗ Bottom of the Pile

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